punjabi funny jokes

Chan te likh deva nam tera, eh mera dil chahnda a. Par...

Ik te mera hath uthe tak nahi janda a
Dusra, Eh khayal dupehar nu aanda a.

oye chak dwa

Ik sharabi daru pee ke mar gaya. Par ohdi daru prati shardha vekho, oh marda marda vi keh gaya: Sharab te theek si, sala liver hi kamjor si

Jis hospital da mein doctor han

Meri vohti uthe nurse hai

Kinna ajeeb zulam sehna painda hai

Apni hi vohti nu sister kehna painda hai.

Sardar Conductor: Kithe jana a.

Bhaiya: Anandpur

Sardar Conductor bhaiye nu chaper marke kehnda: Anandpur Sahib nahi keha janda.

Sardar Conductor to second bhaiya: Tu kithe jana a?

Bhaiya darda darda bolya: Ji main Ludhiana Sahib jana a.

Sardar Conductor bhaiye nu chaper marke: na othe tere peo ne shahidi payi c?

Santa: Papa mein ajj school nahi jana.

Papa: Kyon beta?

Santa: Kal school vich sada weight tolya c. Menu lagda a ke aj sanu kidhre vech na den.

Santa America vich 3-4 mema naal bus te chadan lagda hai. Pehle mema chad gayian. Jado Santa di vari aayi, conductor kehnda "no more, no more"

Santa: Oye mornia chadai jana a te sadi vari kehnda no more no more.

Shaadi to Pehle

Takdeer hai par kismat nahi khuldi

Taj mahal bana-na chan-da han

Par Mumtaz nahi mildi....

Shaadi to baad

Takdeer hai par kismat nahi khuldi

Taj mahal bana-na chan-da haan

Par Mumtaz nahi mardi..

Santa Sydney di ik beach te leta hoya c. Suddenly a man comes and asked: Are u relaxing.

Santa: No I am Santa. 2-3 more men asked him the same question.

Irritated Santa got up & started walking. He saw a man lying on a chair. Santa ask him are u relaxing? He said: yes. Santa slapped him & said: tu ithe baitha hai te loki tainu uthe labh rahe ne.       

Santa: Kal sada kutta khu vich gir gaya
te jor jor di chhekan maran lag pya.

Banta: Hun oh kiven hai?

Santa: Theek hi houga, ajj khu vichon
koi cheek nahi sunai diti.